I know your heart's weathered by what studs did to you...

Hey guys!

As my time in Kenya comes to an end, I'm taking sometime to reflect on things I will take with me when I go home. *inspired by Larissa's blog assignment* I'm glad to say I've got to experience ALOT while I was here. I've literally been from Lake Victoria to the coast and then back again. Being away from my host home to experience Kenya and then to come back has really given me more insight about the opportunities available in this country.

One thing has always struck me whereever I am in this country: a woman's struggle. It's in the city when a woman has cares for someone else's child in order to support her own. It's in the village when a mother is infected with HIV because her late husband was unfaithful but still has hope since her children tested negative. Even now when I'm in a situation where I feel my own limitations being challenged, the stories of these women, of widows, of mothers who have seen their children parish or lead a street life, of women who are punished for being infertile, of rape victims and victims of female circumcision come flooding back into my mind. It's the image of a strong African women who looks at me with an unflinching gaze when she tells me she has come to terms with the fact that she has done all she can with her life, that she only lives now with the hope her children can do better.

It is this determination, this unrelenting drive of all the women I've met here that inspires me and will continue to remain fresh in my mind. Though I've rejoiced at the strength and fearlessness of these women, I am also reminded of the pain this hard exterior is drawn from. Since many of the tribal religions in Kenya have participated in polygamy, women are continually cheated on. Even though the majority of people have switched over to sects of christianity or catholicism, men use the polygamous values of the forefathers to excuse their cheating. From this, women who stay faithful to their husbands become infected by HIV/AIDS. Even if a women knows her husband is having sex with other women, to suggest the use of a condom can lead to domestic abuse and many times the wife will be forced to have sex with her husband.

Because of the extreme poverty in the village, young girls from the highschool are seduced by older, married men with simple treats in exchange for sex. These young girls end up infected or with child or both. The men flee, leaving a single mother behind. I see parallels between the teenage pregnancies here and in Jane-Finch. Both communities are filled with women who distrust men (with good reason). But they also don't expect anything more. And that's what kills me the most. The perpetual cycle of boys being raised by women who naturalize the idea of the man being irresponsible.

Through it all, I will always hear the whispers of countless women at the back of my mind, willing me to take every opportunity I have, advising me not to make a mockery of my circumstance. Dozens of women telling me to remember them when I succeed because there is no reason why I shouldn't. All the while, I am humbled because I think, it could be me. It could be me nursing a child, without promise of food the next day. It is only because of my dumb luck that I was born on the other side of the world, where I experience privileges without having to earn them. I'm thankful the women have opened up to me while I was here and I want to come back to Toronto and optimize every chance I'm given because I know these women would find a way to do it if they were in my position.

With that said, I'll see you soon ;)